Bewildering Times

Change can be exhausting. At least that is my experience.

I often think of making changes yet when I am faced with radical change as we are in this moment in time I see my pattern of excitement, let’s do it , become manic with activity and finally face the one thing I don’t want to face -change takes time, takes step by step movements, can feel awkward, and is truly exhausting.

Since my work came to a shuddering halt a month ago I have been trying very hard to find alternative ways of connecting; setting up zoom meetings with on- going groups, learning painfully how to do online movement classes, staying in touch with friends and family, making radio programmes for our local community radio on movement and its link to positive mental health and on and on.

I don’t think I have experienced such busyness in a long time. Nor have I spent so much time in the one place for at least 20 years. I have been bumbling through a maze of technology that each evening has left me in a state of total bewilderment.

As an embodiediment practitioner I have noticed my shoulders have been up near my ears, my lower back aching, my fingers tired from using the keyboard and my breath being held more often that released.

Trying to find some simple routine has proved elusive until now. When I finally named my uppermost feelings as one of exhaustion at the pace that had suddenly come upon me, followed by bewilderment at the situation we have all found ourselves in,  I sensed I could begin to breath again. Daniel Siegal’s motto “name it and tame it” never felt more true.

I have begun slowly, to sense my feet coming back down to earth, to allow myself the fullness of the outbreath, to look around at all the beautiful views I have from the windows of my house, to recognise that my brain has needed to catch up with the massive pace of change. And most importantly my mind has a new mantra “I am enough”.

I have been practicing a little practice called G.L.A.D from Donald Altman. It is a way to honour each and every effort I make to meet this challenging time.

G= One gratitude that I am thankful for today – keeping it very simple.

L= One new thing I have learned today- which can be something about myself; a new insight or a new fact. It keeps me open and curious.

A= One small accomplishment today – a new skill or an act of self/other-care/compassion

D= One thing of delight that touched me today-anything that made me smile, laugh or brings a micro moment of joy to the day

I bought myself a new notebook so I could record these 4 aspects of life in the time of Covid  19. To remind myself that in the midst of great pain and danger other aspects of life are also  available. And I thought I would like to share it with you.

 

That’s about it from a bewildered and bumbling human learning to be Enough❤💕💖